Remember Remember, the Fifth of November

Image from here (because apparently I have no photos of fireworks or sparklers)

Fire frightens me. And I have hypersensitivity, so loud noises like fireworks and I don't mix. Fifth of November has always been either a hit or a miss for me. Usually it's a miss. When I was little, I adored sparklers. I loved the way they glittered like a magic wand, and you could write your name in the air; pen made of fire, sparks, and heat. As I got older I'd watch from inside as my dad and younger brother would light fireworks. My dad would stand away, and my brothers face would be alight with the colours splashing the night sky. 

Most years, I forget it's Bonfire Night. It's not this global holiday that trends on twitter. It's the UK only, and even then we don't make a big deal of it. It's an ironically quiet celebration, with the sounds of explosives crackling in the air. The smell of smoke perfuming wet clothes drying on the washing line. 

I forget it exists, but it's still there. 

I do the same with The Highest Cloud. So much of my attention is poured into Lost in a Library and passing my A Levels that sometimes I forget about this little blog that I worked for a solid month designing. All the posts are in the draft section, ready to be seen by the world. But I never hit the post button, forgetting this is all real.

Next Tuesday it will be 3 years since I first started blogging at Lost in a Library, and I feel like my style, and my passion towards blogging has been boosted, refreshed, improved upon. I want to be able to manage my time between these two creative outlets well, but first, I need to remember that this exists. That you exist. That maybe you are reading this. 

For now, I'm just going to remember that it's Bonfire Night, and perhaps hold a sparkler or two.

Importance of Privacy

You don't know my last name.

You may if you knew me before The Highest Cloud, and if you are one of my blogging friends. But you. The newcomer. The one how discovered this blog with no prior information. You don't know my last name. You know me as Holly Rebecca.

And that's the way it needs to remain. For now at least. 

Until recent months, I was very open about my online identity. Everything featured my name, first. last. sometimes middle. It felt great to be able to see my name somewhere online. For me seeing a name and it's combination which I've never heard of anywhere else is a very personal thing. 

Then something changed. People who had a disliking for me  invaded my online life and I was left feeling a lot less safe than ever before on the world wide web. 

We rely on the internet to be a happy and secure place, no matter how untrue it is. We hope that everything away from the real world can somewhat be perfect and pristine. A clean slate. It never is. It never will be. Until something happens, you will never realise how much you appreciate and value your own privacy. 

Think hard and carefully before you share so much of your world online. I know it seems like what you want to do at the time, but there may come at time when you regret your own actions more than other people's.

Holly x

Currently

As inspired by Through a Cat's Eyes, and Your Almost Alice

Reading:

....Nothing! I've just finished The White Rose by Amy Ewing (book 2 in the Lone City trilogy) - a book I'd been waiting a year for. Now I'm waiting for Saturday to come around so I can get my hands on Carry On by Rainbow Rowell, which I seriously regret not pre-ordering. 

Watching:

As it currently stands, I can't get into my Netflix account because the person who owns it hasn't texted me back about the new password, which is a shame because there are at least 10 things I have on hold. Last week I had Laryngitis so sat in bed and watched The Breakfast Club and About Time. The Breakfast Club was disappointing, but About Time was phenomenally good - and melted my icy heart to the point where I was crying. Or that could have been the vapour rub. Now I'm scouring my shelves for rewatches - thinking Finding Neverland and Obvious Child. 

Loving:

Southern Culture - this is a England-based jewellery website. I just made my first order from them; Tibetan elephant earrings. Not only are there one off styles, but there are whole collections of watches, rings, necklaces, bracelets on Harry Potter, Peter Pan, Space, and Travel, to name a few.
Green Tea: I've been drinking a lot more of this recently, just for the health benefits that come with it. It's true, it tastes disgusting and smells funny, but I'd really recommend the Clipper Green Tea and Honey version, because that makes the bitter taste seem less like poison. 

Holly x

Summer '15

Dear Summer,

You've been the best Summer that I've ever had. Ever.

This was the summer after my GCSE's, and when I finished school on June 16th, a massive weight felt lifted from my shoulders. This season felt endless, and like it would go on forever. And 11 nearly 12 weeks later, I've changed. Massively.

This was a summer of relief. Of feeling free, calm and relaxed for the first time in years. Of letting go of my worries and doing the things I'd wanted to do for so long. Of anxiously awaiting GCSE results.

I read so many books, both bad and wonderful. A few of my favourites were Second Chance Summer by Morgan Matson, Only Ever Yours by Louise O'Neill, and Nimona by Noelle Stevenson. I caught up on OITNB (well, S2 at least), Once Upon a Time, and watched some truly incredible films.

Summer brought changes of plans - and instead of going to YALC like planned, I ended up in Wales, which is where the most changes happened. I learnt about how I utilize my time, expecting it to trickle slowly, even when it's fast flowing. How there is so much more that I want to do with my life than what I do now. Countless book clubs, meetings of friends and wanderings later, I'm here. And I'm different. Summer brought a version of me that was carefree, and loosened their control on their surroundings.

Summer brought a version of me that is hopefully here to stay.

Writing this, A Levels are 3 days around the corner. They are going to hit me like a train, you can guarantee that. And as much as I'm dreading that aspect, I'm ready. I'm ready for the next step.

Thank you, Summer.

Holly x

Wales 2015

Leading up to July, my family had vigorously planned a holiday to London. However, some circumstances meant that our holiday had to be cancelled, two days before leaving. With no holiday to go on and all the money prepaid returned, we spontaneously chose another place to journey to a few days later - Anglessey. 

Anglessey is a place that my family visited for five consecutive years when I was younger. From the ages of 7 to 12, Wales was a place of escapism and extensive freedom. Although we only went for a week at a time, visiting pretty much the same places each year, it became my favourite place. Four years is a long time, but island is exactly the same.

One of the things I love about Anglessey is the way it feels untouched by the mass market. All the shops are independent and so you never know what will be lying inside. It's a place of peace where although it is busy with tourists, I feel like I can actually hear myself think. 

We spent three full days and 2 half days in North Wales, visiting Beaumaris, Bangor, Conwy, and the majority of Anglessey's island. Going to places where you've been in the past is incredibly nostalgic, as this island holds so many of my childhood memories, but it was also interesting going to new attractions. My Aunt and I's main aim was to reach the beach, as living in a city, it's very rare to ever get to see the sea. We did reach Benllech Beach, and it was glorious. 

If anything, Wales taught me a lot about myself, even if we were only there for five days. I've learnt that the internet isn't my best friend, and there is so much in the world that I want to see with my own eyes and not through a screen. Also, as a book blogger I've always felt obligated to keep reading, and going away taught me that reading is great but it's okay to be doing other things with my time too. Finally, I've come to the conclusion that I loathe living in a city. I don't like the business, the hassle and the sheer amount of people. Despite the fact that I'd already made this choice, I've decided that I'm going to apply to University in North Wales when I start the applications next year. It's a place I want to be, permanently.

Holly x